It's been a little while since I wrote a blog...I have been busy in the background, clearing lots of space!! So much clearing!
Since I last wrote, I have become attuned to reiki. I'd had a few treatments in the past and have found it to be relaxing and energising but always wondered what was on the other side of attunement.
Now, I must admit, I'm one of these people who likes her own personal body space! The idea of being a hands-on therapist or healer has never appealed to me, but I very much enjoy working with energy. I often send "positive vibes" or "healing vibes" to people and I wanted to make sure that I was sending energy in the purest form, and in the safest way for me and the recipient. I was also really curious to find out what difference "being attuned" would make in my life.
I feel very fortunate to have experienced the day with such lovely friends. Lesley Nell at Greenshoots Health - a Reiki Master Teacher and EFT therapist - lead the training with her usual flair. It was relaxing and focused...and yes I did expect a few fireworks and bright lights. I could feel the energy and loved having a pub lunch and a good ol' girly chin wag! Never underestimate the therapeutic benefits of connecting with your friends! It was an uplifting and cleansing day.
Lesley mentally prepared us for a "clearing" that often happens after attunement. I didn't give it much thought at the time.
Off I went home and wondered how I could structure daily reiki practice into my life.
Here we are with our certificates!
We met up 6 weeks later and it was simply amazing at how much has changed in my life! In a good way! I hadn't really connected it to my reiki attunement but it has made such a difference.
I have cleared life clutter, physical clutter, mental clutter, project clutter. And what's been lovely is that I now have more time to be creative, more time for my business (not scattering my energy too far and wide) and more time for my children. We have been baking and being creative and playing. It feels wonderful. I feel like I have been given a fresh start.
As for the daily practice, well, discipline has always been my area to improve upon. I have found that following along to a YouTube video has helped - and perhaps I need to set a calendar reminder while I'm creating a habit.
A good question to ask yourself when making new habits is "what would this new habit give me". The daily reiki practice will help me build up my energy. It will help me feel calmer, more centred and clearer. I have a feeling that I will be more in tune, more in the flow of life and it will help be to feel more creative. Which is great for me, my family, my clients and everyone with whom I come into contact! Be the change that you wish to see in the world!
What's getting in the way of your creativity and/or self-expression?
What can you let go of and clear?
How are your energy levels?
What 3 things can you do to cultivate more energy in your life? When?
Would love to hear your experiences with Reiki. Have you been attuned? Did you experience anything after your first empowerment?
Leave a comment below and share your Reiki story!
With love an infinite (and reiki infused) blessings
I am so excited to share my latest manifestation story!!
At the fabulous Guild of Energists' Conference in Eastborne in November, we were guided through an "Emotional Wall Process" visualisation. In my vision, when I turned around and the wall was gone, I saw the yellow brick road leading straight towards the emerald city. It was a powerful affirmation that my way is clear and I have everything I need within me already. And anything else I need will appear at the right time. Anyway, I saved some pictures on my Pinterest vision board and saved it as my screensaver, and didn't think much else of it.
Around the same time as the conference, I had been wanting to go to Dallas for a clickfunnels conference about online marketing. Tony Robbins will be there as a speaker- it's set to be a fantastic event with industry professionals at the top of their game, teaching us their strategies for success.
The first wave of tickets sold out and with Christmas approaching and a broken down car, I didn't have the money available at the time to book.
But I just knew I'd be there in the room and held on to that vision.
The second, more expensive, wave of tickets came and went.
I still believed!
Then, last week, I was put in touch with someone who had a ticket and couldn't make it....and I had the funds available to buy!
But check this out. Saturday night I was googling pictures of Dallas and was blown away!!! I'm just amazed at the resemblance to the Emerald City picture in my vision!
It was a beautiful confirmation that whatever I need along my journey will manifest, as long as I can trust and simply keep walking in the direction of my dream. I heard Darren Hardy vehemently say that "there is no Secret", referring to The Secret book by Rhonda Byrne. He said, "there is no magic pill, you cannot just sit around imagining cheques and expect to receive them". Well, I have tried and tested this theory and I have actually manifested random cheques in the post...but I take his point. There is still work to be done and action to be taken. Law of Attraction is team work...you and the Universe working together in wonderful harmony! You must play your part!
What can this story teach us about manifesting?
- Dream it and believe it. Let go of the "how" you'll achieve it. Everything is possible for the one who believes!
- Have a vision board, whether it's on paper, on your computer, on pinterest - whatever works for you. But it's very interesting how the pictures I put on there have a funny way of becoming reality.
- The power of association. Find experts in your field and learn from them. Spend time with them, in real life, in the same room. This is so powerful! Books and audios are great but wherever possible, get in the same room! It's like the difference between listening to your favourite singer on a cd in your bedroom and going to see them in a concert. The experiences don't really compare!
Have you got your free ebook on how you can use the Law of Attraction to get whatever you want...visit www.healingbusiness.co.uk to download yours today.
I would love to hear your stories on what fabulous delights you have manifested lately or what tips you have for creating a vision board. Add your comments below!
If you are stuck with your dreams, affirmations, visions and would like some 1-1 Coaching or EFT feel free to book a Discovery Call and we can get things moving for you. Contact me for the booking link.
So you might have seen the new video on my homepage or have heard me talking about my new venture Healing Business.
I'm so excited!! And a teensy little bit scared too!
ClearwaterCoach is changing...
I have had this dream for such a long time and ClearwaterCoach has been a brilliant training ground for me. I've learned so much about business and creating a profitable coaching practice. I really love sharing information, resources and knowledge and the time has come to start packaging up what I know so that I can help people on a much bigger scale.
It doesn't feel right to do that in ClearwaterCoach so it's time for a change...a rebrand...a new name. It feels a bit stepping into my big girl shoes! When I did my Soul Coaching® Oracle Card certification course Denise Linn spoke about having ceremonial clothes to do your work in. It feels like I am ready to truly step into my authentic self and shine! And having a refresh of my brand and offering is the perfect way to to do that.
I've been working on my book, figuring out what online platforms to use, designing my new logo and brand, working with mentors to help me fine tune my ideas into a richly resourceful program and align them with my highest expression.
If you have a healing business or have a business that needs healing, I can help you. Whether it's practical support or re-alignment of your purpose and energy I have the resources you need.
As many of you know, I have rebuilt my life out of a backpack twice. I put the Buddhist non-attachment theory very much to the test in a live and experiential way! Both times were as a result of difficult endings and scary new beginnings. It didn't begin as a clutter clearing exercise but I did learn a lot about how little you actually need, and in fact, it was very liberating.
When you have nothing, it is really easy to be clutter free!
But fast forward 10 years and with a husband and two children added to the mix, it is increasingly challenging to keep on top of the clutter- especially when we have very different standards!
The benefits of clutter clearing and becoming more organised are that:
You will have increased energy and space
You will feel lighter and will be able to find things easily.
You might find you have more money
It takes discipline to keep on top of, that's for sure. In this blog I'm aiming to give you some ideas that you can use to take positive steps to reclaim your space, live free from clutter and energetic blocks.
1 - begin with the end in mind
How would you like it to be?
When approaching this task remember that we are not talking about hiring a skip and getting rid of all of your prized possessions! This is about clearing out those items that do not bring you joy and that waste your time and space!
How would you like to feel in your home? How would you like to feel when you open your wardrobe?
2 - identify problem areas that would benefit from some clearing out
In your mind's eye, walk around your home and identify areas that have a build up of clutter at the moment.
This can apply to your business too. Do you regularly delay updating your expenses spreadsheet and have receipts everywhere or are you late filing your tax return? Is your inbox stacked full of newsletters that you never read? Are you in lots of Facebook groups that are not relevant? Is there a block in a process or a time drainer that if resolved would free up more of your creative energy and time to focus on parts of the business that you are more passionate about?
List these problem areas where clutter builds up and think of solutions.
3- identify problem sources of clutter
For me, in the home, on problem area is all of the bits and pieces that come home from school. Scribbled on bits of paper and random pictures with straggly craft materials hanging off. Less art - more recycling! Permission slips, newsletters and certificates. Also supermarket coupons that get thrust in your hand at the checkout. And I'm just not ready to talk about Lego!
It feels harsh to put children's certificates or "artwork" straight in the bin, especially when they are so proud of it. We'll keep it to show grandparents if it's particularly noteworthy. I put the things I don't want to keep in a 'holding area' and when I go back a week later I'm less emotionally attached so am able to put it straight in the wheely bin! Special things that are worth keeping go into a bag in a cupboard so we can look back at their achievements and at how they've progressed.
Simple things like having a place for your keys and post near the door can help. I open my post near the recycling bin and get rid of rubbish straight away - I don't need to keep fliers in a pile! If I want a takeaway I'll look at the menu online.
If Christmas causes a lot of unwanted clutter you could ask that people donate to a charity of your choice instead of buying you a gift. Or ask for gift vouchers.
What is your biggest source of clutter and what system can you put in place to minimise or remove it before it piles up?
4 - respect your housemates
I clearly remember feeling wonderfully calm and peaceful in Sophie's freshly clean and tidy room. When I asked her if she felt the same she answered that no, she preferred her room as play land. Which essentially means having her toys all over the floor. I saw mess but in her eyes it was an imaginary world that she had created! If you share your space with others, make sure you are all in agreement with how you want your space to be.
When approaching clutter clearing it's a good idea to get family members involved. Listen to what their ideas are of how they would like it to be and what they can do to help.
5 - Decide what you would like to change and take action.
There are many ways to approach the clear out. You could choose a weekend and blitz everything that needs clearing or break it down into bite size pieces and begin with one drawer at a time. Decide what's practical and create a plan. Use these coaching questions to help you:
What is your goal? Why is this clearing exercise important to you? What difference will it make? What is your first step? What are the barriers? What / who can support you with this project? Do you need any resources before you begin? When would you like to complete it by?
6 - The joy test
Walking around your house, look at every item and ask yourself if each object brings your energy up or bring your energy down? Do you LOVE it or use it?
Are you keeping more than one of thing in case one breaks? Do you keep things "just in case"? Have you needed it in the last 6 months or year? Have you used it in the last three years? Open up and trust that if something breaks you will have the resources available to replace them.
Marie Kondo's book "The Life Changing Magic of Tidying" is on my list of books to read. The Japanese clutter clearing expert recommends having a big clear out all in one go, rather than having an ongoing battle with clutter. These before and after photos are pretty impressive!
7 - items that hold big emotions or memories
Objects can seem to have a life of their own. Some hold wonderfully happy memories, others can have painful memories. They can keep you attached to the past in some way. Like that lovely dress in the wardrobe that no longer fits but was such a bargain!!
After you've taken the joy test, collect all of the items together that bring your energy down. Either with a friend or your journal, hold and talk through each one and the memories it holds for you. What is it about this object that you like? What is difficult about letting it go. By sitting down with someone who is not emotionally attached to it, can really help be objective. The person's role is to listen and not persuade! This is an exercise in honouring you memories and feelings, not one of justification. This is your stuff and you can keep it or clear it!
I was holding on to some baby muslins. They were stuffed in a cupboard never used but they were so absorbent and it sounds silly now but I resisted letting them go. I thought they might be handy one day, but I couldn't give an example of how. I asked my husband to help me and he disposed of them for me. I can't really tell you why it was so difficult, but we can have a funny attachment to objects. As soon as I showed him, they lost their power over me and I realised how silly I was being!
If it's really difficult to let go of the item try putting it in a holding area. Put things in a box, seal it and write a future date on. It is important to put the box out of sight.
If by the time the date comes round you have either forgotten what's in the box or you haven't needed to go inside and find an item then you can dispose of it. Don't open the box to see what was inside or you may find you end up where you started!
A friend of mine emigrated and had lots of cards and well wishes from people. She couldn't carry them with her but decided to take photos of them and carry them on a memory stick. You can take pictures of items and keep the memory or find new and joyful ways of keeping memories alive.
You could also turn the item into something beautiful. I made this picture from a scrabble set that was gathering dust at the back of my wardrobe because it reminded me of my uncle that had passed away. I wanted to honour his memory in a beautiful way.
Liz Dixon runs workshops where you can turn every day items into something beautiful and this could be a good way of breathing new life into objects that hold memories and gathering dust.
Tapping is a brilliant tool for shifting stagnant and stuck energy. Check out the video I made giving an introduction to tapping and an outline of the points.
You can start by tapping through the points describing the object, your feelings and the memories. Tap a few rounds like this, take a deep breath, then tap on affirmations giving permission to releasing the objects.
9 - ask for help
Having someone around a friend, loved one or a professional like Lesley Beattie, Organisation Angel around for support can help with the more emotionally charged items or if you have a big task, like downsizing or moving home.
10 - live the life you love!
Make a decision, create a plan, take one step at a time and you will achieve your goal. By putting systems in place you will ensure that you remain on top of the clutter. Your energy will flow easier and you'll feel calmer and more peaceful as a result.
Looking for ideas for what to do with it once you've cleared it?
Facebook selling groups
Give it away
Friends / Family
Local groups / play groups
Recycling bins at local sites
Charity shop - sign up for gift aid and they receive extra on your donations
Little bags of happiness appeal - at the February Health and Wellbeing Networking meeting we collected a car full (literally full!!) of bags and toiletries to donate to a local charity who give them out to homeless women in Oxfordshire.
Search for upcycling on google or Pinterest for some fab ideas!
I would love to hear your stories and experiences with clutter clearing. What's the most difficult thing you have had to let go of? Any positive stories of how clutter clearing has enhanced your life? Share in the comments below!
If you are struggling with clutter and would like to see how EFT can help you feel free to contact me at email@example.com to book in a 30 minute discovery call.
Sending love and best wishes as you move towards a clutter-free and energised life! xxx
Don't you just love it when a book lands in your life and answers all the questions that you've been wondering about, and more?!
I had heard of Diana Cooper but hadn't read any of her work until recently. She did an interview for the 2015 Hay House Summit. Wow, what a session. It was beautiful and inspiring! I shared it on Facebook, as you do, and a friend saw it and lent me some of her books. I'm reading Ascension and I cannot put it down!
One of my fears that I've held, probably since I began my spiritual journey, is "what if I reach my spiritual potential - will I just die? My soul work on Earth will be complete - then what?".
Well, I do like being here on Earth so understandably that fear is going to hold me back! This book reassured me that it's OK, in fact it is necessary and I have the courage to go forward with confidence that all will be OK. I trust that what needs to happen will happen for my highest good and that is OK. It's OK for things to change. It's OK for things to end as new beginnings will naturally evolve and blossom in good time.
One of my favourite Barefoot Doctor affirmations: repeat: "It's OK. It's OK. It's OK. It's OK. It's OK!!!!
Can you relate to that fear of reaching your highest potential? Do you have a fear of success? It's clear see how this fear can lead to self-sabbotage.
I was at meeting last night and met an extra-ordinary person who had played the property game and won. He was financially well-off and after working diligently he had enough money to go off around the world and enjoy the fruits of his labour. But he got bored. He didn't find it fulfilling. Money didn't bring him happiness (I really want to test that theory for myself!). So he decided to do some charity work in Africa and, guess what? He now feels fulfilled and his life is full of purpose and meaning.
His command to the audience at the end was "now go out and make as much money as humanly possible". You can do great things and make a difference with it.
Wow! Staying small doesn't just affect us personally. Think about the difference we could make if we had more to give.
Money can bring happiness, it depends how you chose to spend it.
On a final note, I was overjoyed to read in Ascension that Diana had listed Archangel Retreats around the world. Top of the list was Archangel Michael. His retreat is in Banff Canada (near Lake Louise). As some of you know, I had a spiritual experience in Canada and it's where I chose the name ClearwaterCoach.
I also canoed on Clearwater lake in BC (Clearwater is the other side of the mountain range to Banff) and had a profound experience where I felt deep peace and connected with everything. (I love mountains for that!) The water was so clear and pure, you could drink and swim at the same time! To make a stagnant pool of water clear you need to add clear water. There will be a state of chaos as the dirty water is flushed through but if you keep pouring, the water becomes clear. It's a metaphor for coaching. I help people move from Chaos to Clarity.
I was so pleased to learn that this is Archangel Michael's retreat! It just confirms our connection. I have worked with Archangel Michael in my personal life a lot over the years and I'm ever grateful for his support and protection! He has started to show up in my client sessions too, especially now that I am an EFT therapist.
I'd love to know your experiences with angels, spirit guides and archangels. They have been a big part of my personal journey, though I don't share that with everyone. I recently had a look through the teaching material I received in my coaching course. Under the section of "intuition" it said "a word of warning. Too much "intuition" may make you seem unprofessional and you cannot afford to be seen as belonging to the 'lunatic fringe'.
Oops...may be too late for that!!
Deep breaths! Shine on.
Wishing you a wonderful day, full of love, light and joy!! Allow Archangel Michael to release any blocks to your spiritual and professional development. Feel free to shine your light and make all of your wishes come true!
Do you remember at the end of Bridget Jones when Mr Darcy says "I like you, very much. Just as you are"? Did you melt?!!! It was so romantic! It's not that men are critical and don't love us as we are- mostly I think they have more simple needs and expectations. Women often beat themselves up, and Bridget Jones was a caricature of this. Did being slightly overweight*, a smoker and single make her unlovable?
(*overweight in movie standards, not in real life!)
I gave a talk at a networking meeting a while ago and afterwards I asked a fellow coach for feedback. I specifically asked him if there was anything I could improve on. He said "it was great as it was". I had a similar aha moment to Bridget Jones. I was being overly critical of myself and wanted someone to agree and say "it was good, but not good enough". He refused to collude with my inner critic and it was a wake up call for me.
So I've been wondering what is the difference between wanting to improve upon yourself - to stretch and grow and be the best you can be - compared with accepting yourself just as you are?
Must we always push and strive to be the best? Will we ever reach the place where we stop trying to improve ourselves? Is the work ever done?!
If you accept yourself as you are, do you stagnate?
Here's a brief summary of when it's useful to work on improving yourself and when it's time to look in the mirror and accept and love who you are.
You need self-improvement when:
Your relationships with others are not to your liking. You notice patterns in how relationships break down.
You have unhealthy habits to mask unhappiness, such as over-eating, under-eating, drinking too much, looking for love in the wrong places.
You have a feeling of being out of control, overwhelmed or stuck in a rut.
Your friends and family are worried about you.
You are worried about yourself.
You feel anxious and know that you just aren't yourself lately.
You know there's a better way of living but you just can't figure it out.
You need self-acceptance when:
You are highly critical of others and yourself and nothing ever seems to meet up to your expectations.
You don't take compliments easily.
You are looking for external validation for your self-worth, but don't believe it when you get it.
It's not right unless it's perfect.
You find it hard to receive.
You make yourself really busy and very rarely have 'me time'.
Solutions for Self-Improvement
Once you have identified an area you aren't happy with, imagine how you would like it to be. In an ideal world, what would be different about this situation? Take some time to daydream and imagine this ideal scenario and this will give you clues about what steps you can take towards it. The Wheel of Life is a great tool to give you an overview of your life, where you might like to make improvements and how to do it. You have all the answers within you, all you need to do is make time to be quiet and listen.
Reading self-improvement books can inspire you and give you practical ways to change. The library is a fab resource - it's free and when you loan books rather than buy books it means you don't have unnecessary clutter once you've read them! I recommend Mind Your Language by Nicola Menage - it's a useful book that teaches you how to reframe your thoughts and words to create a better, happier, more successful life for yourself. I bought this one, rather than loan it because it's a book I can refer to again and again.
Seek professional help with eating, alcohol or substance misuse if you feel you need it. Your GP will be able to point you in the right direction.
Do you need to have a quiet word with your inner-critic?! Just by facing her, giving her a name and getting to know her you can learn lots of valuable information. Ask her "what is your reason for pushing me so hard?" It may be that she just wants you to be the best you can be! Her positive intention is to motivate you. Is it a voice from your past? Perhaps it's a parent or teacher that has influenced you in the past? Let this voice know that it's having a negative impact on you. Assure your inner critic that she can trust you to lead the way. It may sound a bit kooki to talk with your inner-self this way but you will discover that these "gremlins" just want to be heard. By having a dialogue with them, you can understand why you are operating in this way and find a way to make changes that will improve your peace of mind. Always approach this inner-work with non-judgement and kindness - doing battle with yourself is counterproductive.
Make time to relax, play and have fun. Be creative and messy....let go of the outcome when you create a piece - it doesn't have to look great, in fact, have a go at making something that you intend to put straight in the bin afterwards. Noone else needs to see it. It will get you in the habit of making something for the enjoyment, rather than for it to be perfect.
When you look in the mirror, notice parts of your body that you like and give love and attention to them. Appreciate your body for its function rather than its appearance. For example, say "thank you legs for being healthy and strong and carrying me everywhere I want to go", rather than "eugh, my thighs are big and are covered in cellulite". What a difference this makes to your self-esteem! Find something you love about every part of yourself and give yourself compliments.
When someone else gives you a compliment act as though it is a physical gift that you have been given. Be grateful! Take those words into your heart and allow yourself to receive them. This will have a positive effect on you and on the person who gave the compliment. You may like to give more compliments to people and see how this lights up the world around you. Look at the world with a more loving, less judgemental eye and watch how that reflects back on you.
Be kind to yourself whether you need to improve or accept yourself. Always be kind!
Feel free to share your tips on what works for you in the comments box below.
Do you believe you can use the power of your mind to create a super healthy you?
Here's how to do it:
I am going to show you how you can use the power of your mind to think your way to super-health.
Studies clearly demonstrate the mind, body connection and your mind’s ability to create your reality. Put simply, being hopeful and feeling positive change the biochemistry in your brain which boosts your immune system.
Let me be clear from the outset, these shortcuts can enhance a healthy lifestyle. They are not meant to replace eating well, exercising, relaxing, getting enough sleep, laughing lots and treating your body with love, care and respect!
Here are your five shortcuts to super health.
Imagine this: super health is at your disposal. You are a healthy, vibrant being. Your body is deliciously joyful and energised. Your cells are sparkly clean and every breath you take cleanses your body of impurities and brings to you the gift of super-health. Imagine being physically fit, capable and strong. Even if this isn’t your reality yet, know it to be true. If you are ill, believe you will get better really quickly. Rather than feed your illness with attention, feed your well-ness with attention and see what a difference it makes.
I've used visualisation to great effect in my health. I cured myself of Irritable Bowel Syndrome in my early twenties, more recently I used visualisation to kick start my weight-loss plan. Before going to sleep, every night, I imagined myself at my ideal weight. I imagined myself working out. I successfully dropped a dress size and hit my goal. Before the actual diet and exercise began, I paved the way with my imagination. I have complete faith in my body to remain healthy and, thankfully, I am rarely ill.
The first step is realising in what ways your health is not how you would like it to be. Whether you have a health complaint or would like to improve your healthy habits, you need to accept them and take ownership of the condition. If you feel resistance, ask yourself “what is the downside of me letting this go?” For example, the downside to deciding to lose weight is that you need to make changes to your lifestyle which may be difficult at first. You may worry what others will think of you. I used the excuse for ages that I couldn’t afford a new wardrobe! Shine your light on your reasons for avoiding change and the benefits for your pain or illness. Be honest with yourself and your excuses lose begin to lose their power.
A fabulous resource to enable you to see how the little actions you take today impact on your future health is the Mirror Room visualisation from Anne Jirch, Future Life Progression pioneer and author of “Create your Perfect Future”.
3: Embrace what is
Critical thoughts diminish your power. It is not useful to heal your body by fighting with it. This will just result in more tension and stress (i.e increased cortisol levels leading to lower immunity). It is far more conducive to super-health to think a way that works for you, and your belief system, to heal your body in a peaceful way. So if you have a virus or an illness you may decide to embrace and wholly accept it. In whatever way that feels right, imagine your illness dissipating in some way. Visualise that part of your body as clean and well, free from illness and pain. You may imagine a higher being removing a dark spot and giving it to the light for transmutation. You may pray to God. You may prefer a more scientific model and use the placebo effect to your advantage. Simply imagine that the things you are currently doing are aiding your wellness and super-health. So be it!
4: Stay Positive
Happiness and optimism have both been linked with lowering the risk of heart disease and strokes, according to Harvard School of Public Health. It is clear that visualisation can only go so far in extreme cases. You can, however, still choose to live your life in a positive way no matter what the external circumstances appear to be.
Ask yourself, what gifts does this illness bring? Does it give you time off work to relax? Does it introduce you to a support network of people, have you made new friends or learned new techniques as a result of this health issue? In what way can your situation positively impact on others? A friend of mine has had a whole new mind-set and new career as a result of her infertility and although she’s been on an incredibly painful and testing journey, she acknowledges that it has brought many blessings to her life. She is now using her knowledge and experience to help others, having set up a support group called Mindful Mamas to Be. We have all witnessed the inspiring “Stephen’s Story” about Stephen’s “adventures with incurable cancer” with his 1.3m followers on Facebook. He helped to raise over £3m for charity in just one year. Stephen said “I have cancer, cancer doesn’t have me”.
5: Be grateful
I don’t know about you but I often find I take my body for granted until a part of it hurts! Or worse still, I am critical of it’s appearance rather than being grateful for it’s function. So rather than thinking “thank you stomach for nourishing me and digesting all of my food. I love you”, I focus on the aftermath of having had two big babies within 16 months of each other. I don’t remember appreciating my lovely toned abs in my early twenties either, I was too busy focussing on the symptoms of IBS and trying to figure out what was making me ill. A good exercise you can do when washing is simply to focus on each body part and give thanks. Try it for a week and see if you’ve noticed a change in how you feel about your body.
So there you have my practical tips and tools to create super-health in your life. Your health is in your hands.
Another great Oxfordshire Project Networking meeting last night. The room was packed and the positive atmosphere was palpable. The room was buzzing! I love that the meetings are so friendly and everyone is so supportive of one another.
Our guest speaker Tanya Collins, of Creating Core Change, talked to us about overcoming fears in business. Following her talk she gave out her 6 main points on the back of her business card which was really useful and a fab marketing idea. She has offered to send out the presentation to anyone who is interested so if you missed that sign up sheet then Tanya’s email address is firstname.lastname@example.org
Tanya’s 6 fear busting tips are:
• Keep saliva on the tip of your tongue It tricks the body out of fight or flight
• Breathe in for 7, out for 11 Rebalances CO2, again tricking body out of fight or flight
• Change the quality of your minds-eye pictures or the self-talk Your brain doesn’t know the difference between your reality and what you imagine about your reality
• Look straight up with your eyeballs! You break the cycle of negative self-talk and minds-eye images
• Cross the midline – infinity sign with arms or circle your eyes Again breaks the cycle of negative self-talk and minds-eye images
• Tapping / pressure on the back of your hand at the triple warmer point Acupressure point to calm the body and reduce stress
As we did our 60 second introductions we all expressed one of our business fears. Going around the room, some were practical (like being injured and not being able to work) and others were fearful of their personal performance, such as failure or not meeting expectations of their customers. A few said they had no fear, and one said they feel the fear and do it anyway. (Recommended read: Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, Susan Jeffers….seriously read it!! If you’ve already read it, read it again!!!)
"Courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to operate in spite of it".
The purpose of the fear sharing exercise was two-fold. Firstly, a bit of solidarity and acknowledgement that everyone round the table has fears and that’s normal in business and indeed in life. If we take that thought one step further…if we didn’t have fear then it means that we aren’t stretching and growing. Fear is part of the fun of stepping out on your own and creating a business that matches your ambitions for life!
There are three zones – comfort zone, stretch zone (fear is healthy and manageable), panic zone (fear is debilitating). It’s worthwhile seeking support if you are consistently in the panic zone.
The second benefit of the exercise is in acknowledging the fear, getting to know it and saying out loud. Very simply, that helps the fear to lose its power. It’s not repressed, locked in a box, secretly whispering in your ear…it’s out in the light where it’s easier to be faced. One of Tanya’s tips was to get to know your fear, befriend it even. Listen to the positive messages that your fear is telling you and in return be kind and compassionate. Work with your fear’s knowledge and together you become stronger and empowered!
Often people find networking pretty scary. I’m a confident person but I still experience nerves before an event. In fact, on the journey over to Farnborough last night I was practicing some of the techniques Tanya mentioned! I felt physically sick, my heart was racing, my stomach kept dropping and I felt jittery. I left the kids with their Daddy at the dreaded “witching hour” – the crazy time before bedtime when tempers are frayed and patience is wearing thin. In the car I began tapping on my nerves and a funny thing happened. After a few rounds of tapping on my symptoms I realised that this nervousness and fear was actually excitement and exhilaration! I tapped around my confidence and did a few positive rounds to finish it off. I did some deep breathing, positive self-talk, positive visualisation and felt much better by the time I’d arrived. I had a peppermint tea to also calm my tummy and steered clear of caffiene!
I’m telling you this because I often hear people tell me that I appear confident. They are surprised when I say I have nerves or feel anxious about networking. I want to you know that although I do get nervous I take control with these simple yet powerful tools that are really easy to learn and definitely make a difference! I had an EFT and hypnotherapy before last month's meeting which also really helped to clear my fears.
I’d love to hear your comments about your business fears and what strategies you use to overcome them.
Sending sparkles of light, courage and self-belief your way,